Really, what is love? We all now it is something you feel, like an emotion, but do you ever know if its love or just some infatuation with someone. And can anyone ever describe what love is anyway? I always ask people what does it feel like to be in love, they always say the same thing: "it's the best thing in the world," or "It feels like a really strong bond with someone," (no shit)... or sometimes they will say, "some day you will find out." But when will I find out, if I don't know how it feels.
Don't get me wrong, sometimes I get this feeling when I see a cute boy, the feeling where everything seems to slowdown while your eye meet. Most of the time it's just in my head though. I know that can't be love because 'that cute boy' ends up being one of those popular scumbags that make fun of the weird people, the same people that make you sick for being so cruel.
Well, anyways, this idea for writing this passage came to me because my mind was drifting away in a day dream and in that dream, I said, "I love you", to that mystery boy... that mystery boy I don't even know.
I am so weird and complex... usually girls don't have trouble talking to guys and then start to have feelings for them after knowing each other for a while. Me? I'm quite the opposite. Once I see a cute guy I get all nervous and curl into my security shell. So I usually never make it to the part when you actually talk to them on a regular bases. I always dwell about how I used to be outgoing, but now I realize that by doing that is not going to make me outgoing again. My group is super shy so that does not really help... If I ever want to put myself out there I need to over come this fear of rejection and pain. I feel like its something I have to do.
